Yo Mama so poor that when burglars break into her house they leave money.
Empty your pockets! I swore you just stole my heart!
Is there a fireman around? 'Cause you're smokin'!
Do you know karate? 'Cause your body is kickin'!
Did it hurt? [what?] When you fell from heaven, did it hurt?
I wish I was your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves.
Photons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic.
Chuck Norris can speak Spanish... in Russian.
What do you call an eternity? Four blondes at a four way stop.
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are running from the cops. They hide on a potato farm. They crawl into some potato bags. The first cop pokes the bag with the brunette in it. She says, "Meow." The cop confirms that it is just a cat. The second cop pokes the bag with the redhead in it. She says, "Woof." The cop says that it is just a dog. The third cop pokes the bag with the blonde in it. She says in her sweetest voice, "Potato."
Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks.
The first blonde said, "Those are deer tracks."
The second blonde said, "No, those are elk tracks."
The third blonde said, "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks."
The blondes were still arguing when the train hit them.
Yo Mama so fat, when she walked in front of the TV I missed 3 commercials!
Yo Mama's so fat, when she backs up she beeps.
Yo Mama's so fat, she has to get out of the car to change radio stations.
Yo Mama's so stupid she used a real mouse to use the computer.
